What is a unicorn and why do people look for one? So, a unicorn traditionally has meant a hot bi babe, almost always a woman, that a generally cisgender het-leaning couple looks for to complete their relationship. So, a man and a woman are in a relationship. They are looking for a third who is […]
Is it healthy or normal to feel jealous when polyamorous? Yes, jealousy is a feeling. It is a normal thing to feel. It can be healthy. I think that what I would say is that there is no emotion that is necessarily healthy or unhealthy to feel. They all just are. Our emotions give us […]
Okay, is hierarchy and polyamory always bad? Okay, so in order to answer this question, I need to start by defining terms because hierarchy is one of those terms that people use in very different ways. So, hierarchy, in my way of thinking about it, is a relational structure wherein people in one relationship get […]
How can I recognize when I'm being manipulative? So, I think this is complicated because again, there are so many societal components to what we perceive as manipulation. Like I think a lot of people are very easy – it's easier for them to recognize that like a woman saying to her husband, “If you […]
How can I tell if I'm being gaslit? I want to preface this by saying that gaslighting is a very particular thing, and it is not the only bad thing. I think that what I'm going to answer for this question is not just how do you know if you're being gaslit, but how do […]
What are my best tips for happy fat sex? Okay. So here are my tips for happy fat sex. Number one, the more ashamed you feel of your body, the less good your sex is going to be. There has actually been a ton of research about the ways that particularly people socialized as women […]
How can I rebuild desire after NRE? New Relationship Energy. So, I mean this question for me is kind of an interesting one, because I guess I'm wondering like what kind of desire are we talking about, and like what's the issue? A lot of people when they're in NRE, they have a ton of […]
What is the difference between swinging and polyamory? Now I'm going to answer this in very general terms. Everybody who does swinging, everybody who does polyamory does it a little bit differently. So, in general, swinging is a thing that is practiced by couples wherein they have generally only sexual interactions with other singles or […]
What should I do if I really don't like my metamour? I'm such a therapist. I'm like, I have questions about your questions. So, what do you mean by you really don't like your metamour and like what do you need to do? Here's the thing. I think that people assume that polyamory can only […]
How do I handle family who vote against me? Okay, so there's no right answer here. I think that the questions to ask yourself are, what kind of relationship can you feel good about having with the people who they are? If someone is willing to vote for someone who thinks that you don't deserve […]
